School, Week 2

Since my last post, we've had some more rough mornings at school.  Thursday and Friday mornings were clinging, tear-filled, forcible goodbyes.  So we feared what would happen this morning after a weekend filled with lots of family time.  We started out on a good note. Sasha got dressed without a fight and said a happy goodbye to me on his way out the door.  After donning his cape, of course.

And then, on to school.  One block from school, he asked Mama to carry him.  This was not a good sign.  In fact, while doing some internet research on how to help preschoolers adjust, I found one person who suggested not carrying them to school because it makes the parting even harder and undermines the "big  boy" aspect of going to school.  I don't find that convincing. Nonetheless, when Sasha asks to be carried, it's usually because he's tired or needs some love; neither of those reasons are going to help ease the transition.

Mama agreed to carry him and when they arrived, Sasha said good morning to his teachers (an improvement) and walked in by himself.  Nerdy said he hesitated in the entryway for a minute, as though deciding whether or not this was going to be okay with him. Ultimately he chose to agree: he gave Mama a kiss and hug goodbye, and she was out the door within 5 minutes, leaving a happy Bub in her wake.

Happy to Report

Yesterday's trip to school was slightly better than Monday.  He started putting up a real fight once it came time for the shoes to go on and the screaming didn't last long.  By the time we were in the elevator on the way out of our building, he had settled into a steady cry.  Once again, agonizing for everyone, although I'll admit to being slightly amused by the huge yawns interspersed with the tears.  He slept a terrible night, refusing to go to sleep until late in the evening, waking up crying in the middle of the night, then again before the crack of dawn-- up for the day at 5:30.

When we arrived at school, Teacher Tiffany met him at the door and tried to take his hand down the stairs into the schoolroom.  He refused, and wouldn't say hi, though a smile cracked.  Once inside the door, he ran off to go play with his friend Margot on the floor while Nerdy and I were reassured by the teachers that he was fine the previous day once he calmed down.  Apparently, he didn't calm down very easily, which as most of you know, is highly unusual for him and further broke my heart.  Then he was all smiles and gave me and Nerdy big hugs and kisses and a cheery "Goodbye!"

Here I have to commend the teacher who dealt with him: she held him, took him into the bathroom and washed his face with a warm cloth, then when he remained unhappy, she asked him if it would help if she drew a picture of his family. He said yes and she drew a little stick-figure drawing of a little Sasha with a mama close on either side.  He helped draw the sun and other background flourishes. (Maybe.  That's what the teacher told me, but when I asked Sasha if he drew that, he said, "No. Some other kid did.")  Then (apparently*) he asked that it be put on the wall.  It had pride of place as the only thing tacked to the corkboard when I arrived in the afternoon.

*I say "apparently" because I am just now realizing that I will never have a real idea about what goes on at school.  I only get to speak with the teachers for a few minutes every day and Sasha is a brick wall of silence about anything related to school.  When asked-- about snacks, naptime, activities, teachers, friends, etc.-- he only says, "Let's talk about that later."  Like a mantra, "Let's talk about that later."  Finally, Nerdy tried cornering him into an answer, "When's later? At dinner? or tomorrow?" And what does the stinker answer? "Umm... Saturday."  He doesn't even know what that means, but apparently he knows that it's a long enough time into the future that by then we'll forget what it was that we wanted to know.

So when I picked him up in the afternoon, I got one of those heart-melting hugs when he saw me, jumped up, and ran across the room into my arms, yelling "Mamu!"  And the teachers said he was perfectly happy all day.

And this morning, no crying! Yay!!!!!!!!!!!  Well, a few tears over the choice of t-shirt, but he walked all the way to school with Mama and a smile, and when he walked in, his new friend Mia ran up to give him a hug and he gave her one right back.

Sorry to Report

Today was not a good day for Sasha on his first full day of school.  He was perfectly fine while getting him dressed this morning, but when it came time to put on his shoes, "No."  Would he like to wear his green shoes or his sandals?  "I'm not going to choose because I'm not going to school." But school was fun last week!  "I don't want to go to school, I want to stay home and play with my toys and with you."

Uh oh.  We expected resistance, but not today, not before he's even experienced a full day there.  I had to carry him out of the apartment while he cried and clung furiously to the doorknob. He proceeded to cry all the way to school (5 blocks) and into the building.  Even seeing all the kids who were there having fun didn't matter.  The teachers tried cajoling him into staying.  I showed him the sandbox (with dinosaurs!) they had set up and he paused through the tears, but when I tried putting him down to play with it, forget it, he wasn't that interested after all.

Finally, Nerdy and I just said goodbye and handed him over to a teacher. The agony.  I believe tears were shed all around.

After I picked him up and we arrived home, I told him how proud I was that he stayed at school and had a good time (according to his teachers) even though he was crying in the morning.  He said, "Well, even though I was good today, I don't want to go to school tomorrow." Then we had some good playing-on-the-floor time with cars and little people which unfortunately ended with 15 minutes of bashing my guy with each of his superheroes and Toy Story people in turn.  If you aren't familiar with his collection, that's a lot of bashing. And before bed, he reminded both of us again that he definitely does not want to go to school tomorrow.

So now I go to bed with dread in my heart.

School Post Script

School is hard work!

First Day of Preschool

Sasha's first day of school was Wednesday!  It was only for 90 minutes and both Moms were there, so not a big deal, but he got to meet the teachers and the other kids.  He was surprisingly shy around the teachers and didn't pay much attention to the kids.  But Thursday, Day 2 (another 90 minutes with parents), he got friendly with the kids and paid no mind to Mama.

Today is his first big day going alone.  We're very excited to see how it goes, and so far we haven't got a phone call.  Today is only a half-day and I'm sure he'll be happy as a clam.  I am worried about next week, though, when he faces the shock of full days away from home, that this isn't a one-time special event. I know I'll be feeling the pain. I just hope is very social nature will carry the day and he'll decide that being around other kids all day is way better than hanging out with Mamu.  Maybe some kid will be just as eager as Sasha to play superheroes all day long.

First day of school pic!

 

Sesame Place Weekend

We've known since April that Sasha would be starting school this week.  And because we figured it will be a difficult adjustment, we decided to do something special for him on Labor Day weekend. We were the best parents ever: we took him to a theme park.  Sesame Place, to be specific, located just outside of Trenton, New Jersey.

Sasha had an absolute blast.  The place is basically a water park with lots of water slides, pools, and things that squirt water. They must hold the world record for The Most Inventive Ways to Get People Wet.  Sprinkling flowers, water wheels, gurgling fountains, buckets that dump water on you, intentionally leaky hoses, even a giant squirting rubber ducky.  Here's the Bub waiting for his turn down the slide with Mama. (I didn't think a life vest could be so cute.)  He didn't seem to mind at all the hour-long wait for the 9-second ride.  In fact, he wanted to immediately wait in another incredibly long line to go on a different slide, but we persuaded him to try something without a line.

 

He was also excited to see Elmo and Murray in person.  And he desperately wanted to go in the fake Sesame Street buildings facade, though ultimately he settled for getting Big Bird's mail.

 

We spent much of the second day in the toddler pools.  Amazing how much fun one foot of water can be.  Sasha loved to show off his "swimming," pulling himself around by his arms while his legs floated.  Around and around a sprinkling archway, he pretended to be Iron Man, then a mermaid, then we were all a mermaid family.  The two bigger mermaids preferred to sit on the edge of the pool, but that was fine with Sasha as long as we continued to be impressed by his amazing swimming abilities.

Of course, we made a couple of rookie mistakes. Like FORGETTING TO TAKE THE STROLLER. Major oversight.  Also, we foolishly thought Sasha would sleep well after his days playing in the water and sun.  Wrong.  He partied like a rock star at the hotel, staying up late and getting up early.

The trip was pretty much exactly what we hoped for.  A theme park bonanza followed by an extra day spent in the hotel pool, where Sasha spent many hours being held above water by one of us or by a little white buoy. He shed tears in the car when he realized that we were going home to Brooklyn and not back to Sesame Place-- or the hotel.  Sad, yes, but evidence that he had tons of fun.