Dearly Beloved

A very sad day at the Greenwood Playground. The Red Car, beloved by Sasha and many others, lost a wheel. Now the hordes of Brooklyn children who vie for a few minutes with the playground's most precious resource will have to make do with other toys. I'm not sure there's anything else there of interest to Sasha. We tried to keep it out of his line of sight, but eventually his eagle eyes saw it and he cried when we wouldn't take it out of the trash to let him push it around again. (Nerdy admonished me for taking pictures of his pain.)

Goodbye, Red Car. We will remember your bright shiny colors on dreary days, and we honor your service to the public. Countless children are steadier on their feet because of you.

Autumn

Sasha Turns One!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Happy Birthday, Sasha Sky!

The Bub started his birthday celebration last night with his grandparents from da Bronx. Nana and Zayde brought a present for the little guy and food and champagne for the rest of us. He seemed bewildered by the birthday song and cupcake, but I'm sure he felt the love. This morning, he got birthday wishes via a Skype call with Aunt Margot and a Youtube video from Aunt Carrie and Taylor. A card in the mail from Aunt Maureen. Then Aunt Mollie called to sing him the birthday song. Later, packages full of toys were delivered from Aunt Wendy, Grandma and Grandpa Z, and Grandma and Grandpa J. And then, before bed was another Skype call with a birthday song from Aunt Alice and Maya.

Nerdy and I have been reminiscing about where we were and what we were doing one year ago today. Hard to believe how much has changed in that short time. We've also been reflecting on how important family is and how much we rely on the people around us who love us. That has never been more true than in this past year. It's been quite a roller coaster and we wouldn't have gotten here without the love and support of all of you. So thank you.

Adoption Home Visit

This weekend we had a social worker come to visit us in our home to evaluate our fitness as parents. She stayed for about 2 hours, asking us VERY detailed questions about us, our lives, our families, our relationships, our finances. I think it went well and Sasha did his best to charm her, smiling and talking and playing coy when he "accidentally" went near her. He was trying to steal her pen and paper by the end of the visit, so I guess he thought she was all right. We'll get her full report in early December which will be the last paperwork needed by the adoption court. Then we will be scheduled for a final hearing where I get to dress him up in his sartorial finest. Oh, and officially become his Mom.

Visit from Aunt Carrie

The Amazing Aunt Carrie visited this weekend, bringing with her a bag of tricks for Sasha. She arrived in the evening, so he didn't meet her until the following morning. We were expecting him to be surprised to see her and a little wary, but nope, he saw her and gave her a big grin as if to say, "Hey I know you and I remember that you're pretty fun, too." So he climbed right up on her lap and she started playing hide-and-seek with a little cow she brought for him-- a game that never got old even after they played it all weekend.

We visited the Coney Island Aquarium, saw some fish and sharks and jellyfish, and ate an ungodly amount of grapes on the way home. Even Taylor got to enjoy a piece of the aquarium in the form of a stuffed penguin and some temporary tattoos with a sea life theme. She has a new obsession with penguins thanks in part to repeat viewings of "Happy Feet." When it's over she asks for "Mo...? Dancing...? Penguins....?"

Carrie also showered Sasha with gifts for his birthday: a warm hat (pictured below), a bouncy ball, and an excellent set of blocks. And a mostly empty bottle of water which he is playing with as I write this. The downstairs neighbor surely hates the blocks already-- Sasha loves to unstack the pile by slamming each block into the floor and halfway across the living room.

But the biggest news of all is that Carrie is so exciting she apparently warrants HIS FIRST STEPS. That's right, while we all were watching him play, he walked right to her! Yay!!!!! See the video clip below for more (filmed by Carrie).

Then he was too excited and couldn't do it again:

Sasha at the Playground

Well I'm pretty sure walking is just around the corner. Check out this video of the busy guy at the playground, pushing his favorite toy and being distracted from it by an empty box of raisins.

First Halloween

Papers Filed!

I have finally filed the paperwork for me to officially become one of Sasha's parents. The set of papers the court needs (or at least asks for) is outdated and occasionally bizarre. Because the law hasn't caught up with family realities, Nerdy is considered both the birth parent and the adoptive parent for the proceeding. The problem is that she has to submit papers as though she was giving up her child to some unknown person and as though she was about to become a mother for the first time through adoption, having not known Sasha before. This makes the requirements twice as offensive and often contradictory.

For example, as the birth mother, she had to sign an Adoption Information form giving (or refusing) Sasha permission to find out her identity once he turns 18. She also had to list Sasha as a child born out-of-wedlock with the Putative Father Registry; this means if some guy thinks he may have knocked up Nerdy, he can check the registry to find out if she had a kid and is secretly putting it up for adoption. Seriously. The clerk told me that we can also submit a letter from the cryogenic lab (aka sperm bank) stating we were clients. But that paper has no legal significance and we would still have to list Sasha as an out-of-wedlock birth for the public files.

So on the other hand, because she is also the adoptive parent, she, along with me, had to get fingerprinted at our local precinct and cleared with the state's Child Abuse Registration. We both need to submit medical certificates stating we're in good enough health to adopt a child. We also have to hire a social worker to visit our home and write a report approving our household for the court. And the social worker needs her own list of papers from us, not least of which are written recommendations from our friends!

As I write this, I'm getting ticked off all over again at how stupid and insulting this process is and again asking, why are we even doing this? But then I think about how I took Sasha to the doctor this week and, sitting in the waiting room, I'm hoping nothing too bad is wrong because I have no authority to make medical decisions on his behalf. Then I'm glad we're doing it because too much depends on a piece of paper to disregard it.

In, Out

There's a new game around here that's all the rage. The meditative value of placing things in and out of a container cannot be underestimated; it's toddler nirvana. As you may know from previous posts (or personal experience), Mister has for a while now enjoyed taking objects out of their place and scattering them around the apartment. But now he is graduating to the sequel, "in." He's elaborated on the standard Take All My Clothes Out of My Dresser Drawer game by adding Take All My Diapers Out of the Cabinet and Put Them Into the Now-Empty Dresser Drawer. The new and improved game, while interesting, didn't make things more fun for me.

In and out has spread to other activities, however, that have made things easier on his attendants. For example, Sasha pilfered the 2 of diamonds from a card deck and carried it to the hall closet. He proceeded to put the card in and out of the milk crate on the floor of the closet for 20 minutes. First the left side, then the right side, down deep and then just inside the rim, facing in or out, crumpled or straightened, etc. All this required extraordinary attention and focus, providing Mommy with some time to write an email or two. Even putting a wooden peg in and out of his toy bucket is good for at least 30 rounds of in and out. I was able to enjoy an entire cup of hot coffee at the Tea Lounge while Sasha put a quarter in and out of the cap to his bottle. Delightful for both of us.

One downside to the game is the collateral damage. I searched the house for the bottle of teething pills that I knew were around here somewhere. I finally gave up and used Tylenol. Weeks later, Nerdy tried to put a tape in the VCR and it wasn't going in. She fiddled with it a few minutes and lo and behold, a bottle of teething pills were hanging out inside. Or the time I was going insane trying to find a matching sock for Sasha. Days later, I saw a glimpse of it inside the plastic box where I keep sewing accessories-- in my closet, under a 20-pound heap of clothing. I still don't know how he managed to pry the lid open with one hand. Over the weekend, I found a small stash of Cheerios inside a bookshelf. I imagine this game will last for a while (this summer, Maya was still enjoying "hiding sings") and we will lose many things over the course of the coming months.

Brooklyn's Newest Tech Geek

To try and distract the Bub from banging on the keyboard while Wisco or I are doing important work on the internet, we got him a fabulous new toy. I asked the IT guy at work if he had any old parts that he could spare and he was happy to help by bringing in a very old and very dirty keyboard. Now Sasha can smash keys to his heart's content and we can still read the paper (or Facebook).